What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 20.06.2025 00:43
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Why are black people seen as scary or a threat to some people?
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
What was the craziest place that you had sex with someone in public?
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Why won't my mom let me come home if I'm homeless?
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
When does a man tell a woman he has feelings for her?
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Why am I sweating so much at night even though my room is really cold?
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Make Nazis afraid again!
Have you ever accidentally found out that you were about to be fired?
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Which country has the best and strictest legal system in the world?
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
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What is the best music album of all time?
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.